Joke Thread ... Add yours.

[Kingy]

A couple had retired for the night and the woman became aware that her husband was touching her in a most unusual manner. He started by running his hand across her shoulders and the small of her back. He ran his hand over her breasts, touching them very lightly. Then he proceeded to run his hand gently down her side, sliding his hand over her stomach and then down the other side to a point below her waist. He continued on gently feeling her hips first one side and then the other. His hand ran further down the outside of her thighs. His gentle stroking then started up the inside of her left thigh, stopped and then returned to do the same to her right thigh. By this time the woman was becoming aroused and she squirmed a little to better position herself. The man stopped abruptly and rolled over to his side of the bed. "Why are you stopping?" she whispered. He whispered back ...... " I found the remote!"

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This afternoon a man collapsed on top of the London Eye. Doctors attending the scene say the man is slowly coming round.